It's very sad really. There are millions of women and girls in this world depriving themselves of some of the happiest moments merely because they don't want to: skip a workout, leave the house without makeup, or appear undisciplined.
I love my ability to change and grow. I have changed so many times in my lifetime and am happiest in my current skin. While I will not say that every stage that I went through was a stage that I am proud of, I will say that every stage taught me some valuable life lessons.
I went through my angsty, "nobody understands me" stage. During this time I hid in my room, listened to Nine Inch Nails and Nirvana, and wrote really dark, dramatic poetry. I went through my party girl stage where I danced all night in 5 inch heels and woke up lying next to puddles of vomit (very embarrassed of this stage). I also experienced a hateful stage. I was going through some self loathing and regret at the time and I decided to take it out on everybody around me. This was the worst stage.
I have learned to "put my big girl panties on and get over it!" I can whine, beg, repair, and change myself all I want to but the relationships and situations that occurred remain the same. They are a part of my past so I have chosen to learn from them, not repeat them, and move on.
I am now in what I like to call my "butterfly" stage. I have gone through the egg stage, the caterpillar stage, and the cocoon stage; now I get to experience the butterfly stage.
I get to fly through the air, gliding on the breeze and learning from the world. I get to be beautiful and comfortable in my skin and exquisitely graceful. I am finally a beautiful butterfly and I am finally happy with who I am.